Sunday, October 14, 2007

Tribute to Ruth Kemper Reames March 5, 1912 - October 11, 2007

My Grandma, Ruth Kemper Reames, was my role model and personal hero. She loved me and was always interested in what turns and adventures my life took, regardless of the outcome. She understood that it is the simple things that matter most. Good food, family, friends, and laughter were her ingredients for a full and happy life. She didn't judge the actions of others, merely observed and was available to talk if you wanted to, but mostly just loved you. Regardless.

My grandma died Thursday morning. She was 95 years old and had been married to Freeman Reames for more than 70 years. She went to sleep and didn't wake up. We should all transition so peacefully.
She was an extraordinary woman. She was one of 6 children: 5 girls - Evelyn, Pauline, Helen, my grandma, Pearl, and a brother, Donald. She was a mother of 3 children: Sandra, Peggy, and Dan. My mom, Sandra, was her first child, and I was her first grandchild. Grandma was wise and accepting. She was also a business owner - she had a beauty shop in their home. Trips to Grandma's house, for me as a young girl, meant polishing my nails and sitting in the dryer chairs reading "Photoplay" and "Modern Age"- both "People" type magazines about
Hollywood and the stars.

Grandma was a great cook! Everyone who ate her applesauce agreed that it was the best they'd ever eaten! Her pies were incredible, too, and I am not a pie person. She also made FANTASTIC sugar cookies, but swore that my grandpa's were better.

She loved to fish with my grandpa – it was one of their favorite recreational pastimes. She was an excellent seamstress and could hook a rug, quilt, and embroider.

One visit several years ago, I listened to a conversation between my mom, and my grandma and grandpa about a peach. The conversation was a long one, regarding the size of the peach, where she'd found it, that it was big enough to share, that it made 2 peach pies, how juicy and sweet it was, and how delicious this peach was and how much they had enjoyed the peach pies. That was my first clue about the real important things in life, and that my life was not allowing time to just reflect on the really simple things, like a peach. I’m sure there were many conversations like this, but it was the first one I’d really heard.

Visits to grandma's house also meant listening to the latest records in my Uncle Dan's collection. I was totally into his music in the early 60's. He is only 5 years older than I am, so I had an early musical education and was introduced to “the British Invasion” - "The Dave Clark Five", "The Rolling Stones", "The Animals", and "The Beatles". Grandma was great about letting me play his records, even though I'm sure it was the last thing she wanted to listen to. And when I would bring a girlfriend with me for a weekend visit, Grandma encouraged us to hang out in the breezeway and sing along with Diana Ross and the Supremes - "Stop, in the Name of Love" and "Love Child. We were also really good at "Jimmy Mack" and "Dancin' in the Streets" by Martha Reeves and the Vandellas.

Grandma and Grandpa lived at
Indian Lake, Ohio until about 10 years ago, when they moved permanently to West Palm Beach, FL. They were surrounded by their 3 children until last year when my Aunt Peggy moved to the Atlanta area. In June, 2006, my Grandpa Freeman died. My grandma's family members were her best friends and with whom she socialized. After Grandpa died, she lived in their condo for awhile, and then was invited to live with my Uncle Dan and Aunt Gracie. My Aunt Gracie took this photo of Grandma in July.

She spent Sundays with my mom, volunteered at the homeless shelter, the Salvation Army, and checked in on her friends. She baked, played cards, and loved life. She taught me homeopathic remedies, to trust my inner voice, not to take myself or life too seriously, and that age was only a number. She didn't live her life or make choices about her activities based on her age. She said that you must never let your age determine your choices or actions. It is only a number. Age is a state of mind.

Grandma will be remembered by her 3 children, 8 grandchildren, 10 great-grandchildren, more nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews than I know of, and hundreds of people whose lives she touched.

I am grateful to have had her in my life, and that Max had his great grandpa till he was 18 and his great grandma till he was 19.

She lived fully and died peacefully. I carry her in my heart.


2 comments:

Marissa Skudlarek said...

Hi,

I am a playwright researching a piece about a production of Shakespeare's "Antony and Cleopatra" at Vassar College in 1934, where a student named Ruth Kemper played Charmian, Cleopatra's handmaiden. I found your blog when googling her name. While I don't know if your grandma is the Ruth Kemper I am looking for, her birthdate is in the right range for it to be her. Was your grandmother a Vassar graduate?

Regardless of whether we are talking about the same Ruth Kemper, I am sorry for your loss. Your grandmother sounds like a wonderful lady and I am glad she lived such a long and happy life!

If you would like to get in touch with me (especially if you have any anecdotes about your grandmother in college), my e-mail is maskudlarek@vassar.edu. Thanks.

John Reames said...

Hello, I saw your blog and read Spirited Journey; memories of your grandmother. Let's communicate.